hoarder? not me

The concept of Hoarding has become a hot topic lately, mainly because of A&E’s hit show Hoarders. After watching every episode of the show at least once or twice, it dawned on me that I myself may have a hoarding problem. So I looked around my room, but I didn’t see any dead mice or cats, didn’t have to climb over a four foot pile of used diapers, and surely didn’t have to put on any gas masks to combat the stench of 5 years of taco bell wrappers. But I did notice that I have a ton of stuff. Stuff that I probably could throw out. I just don’t want to. I don’t think it’s a psychological issue. I just don’t know why I would throw out a perfectly good H20 1998 European tour tee shirt when I could still be wearing it. I rarely do, but that doesn’t mean I might not ever wear it again. Sure, I probably won’t ever take out my talking Mr. T keychain out of it’s box, but there’s no way I’m tossing it.



I know I don’t need those beer bottles. But I like the bottle design. So sue me. I know a 26 year old dude shouldn’t be holding onto a stuffed Mighty Mouse doll. But I like Mighty Mouse. So I’m keeping him. I could have chucked all of my race bibs. But looking at those gives me inspiration to keep running. So I’m keeping them.



Do I need another Mighty Mouse doll riding a dinosaur on top of my bookcase? Probably not. I probably don’t need that coconut head, the Abe Lincoln bobblehead, the robot pencil sharpeners, or some of Pez collection on display either (trust me, that’s only about 1/8th of my collection. The other 400 pieces are at my parent’s house). But I like everything here. I’m not scared that if I throw them out my pet fish are going to die, which makes me a non hoarder. I don’t have any psychological ties to any of this stuff. I just like it all.

I have come across a problem, however, when it comes to some of my clothes. Well not clothes per se. Just a belt and a pair of shoes.



I bought this Quiksilver Scout belt just about the same time I got my learners permit. Being the late bloomer I am, that was right around my 17th birthday. I’m seven weeks away from turning 27. I’ve worn this belt almost every single day of the last (almost) 10 years. Any time I’ve needed to wear a belt, this was it. Weddings, Funerals, Baptisms, Proms. On an everyday basis to keep my shorts and pants from falling down. This was, and still is, my only belt. I love it. But, in maybe the past 6 months, the belt has began to stop doing it’s job. The fraying has become too severe, the buckle barely buckles, and the only evidence that it was once a bright baby blue color is about to fade away. I find myself adjusting it 4 or 5 times a day to keep my pants up. I’m not crazy. I know I need a new one. I started looking about 2 months ago. But I cannot seem to find a belt even remotely close to this one. All the surf shops sell are studded belts. I refuse to wear a leather one. I don’t know what to do. An eBay search for “Quiksilver Scout Belt” yields 0 results. I am at a complete standstill. Keep in mind, I’ve had this belt for just about 10 years. I plan on having my next belt for at least that long as well.



These Converse are another story. I got these mothers right before my senior prom. So that was in June 2001. As we near the end of 2009, I’m still rocking these bad boys like 3 days a week. My family and friends despise them. They have rips, holes, and tears. They are filthy. They are basically unwearable. They barely stay tied or on my feet. Again, I know I need a new pair. But somewhere between 2001 and 2009, Nike bought out Converse. I do not support Nike. Never have. So what do I do? I love, love, love my Chuck Taylors. These guys have seen everything. They were there for Q and Not U’s final show. Guess what I was wearing when I saw Andrew WK with 30 other people during heavy blizzard a few years back. Yup. These very Chucks. So now what? I might be able to get another year out of these things. But I can’t see myself consciously going into a store and buying a pair of Nikes, which is what Converse now is.

So I’m not a hoarder. Do not call A&E to try and get me on that show. Maybe you can get me on Intervention though, since I clearly have an addiction to keeping things.